Thursday, December 11, 2008

Rain/The Fairies

I am soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo sorry I didn't post yesterday! It was raining hard, and all day my computer couldn't get any possible signal. Because of this, I was bored, and wrote this poem:

Rain, Rain, Go away!
Come again another year!
Or at least another day!
Or I'll rip my hair out, ear to ear!

As a bonus:

The Fairies; or Diamonds and Toads (By Perrault)

Once Upon a Time, this chic is always beaten up by her stepmom and stepsis because they hate her and the other members of her family are dead.

Wow. This definitely doesn't sound familiar.

The girl has to go to a well one day, and while there getting water, Jack fell down, and broke his...

Oops! Wrong story. Guess I was thiking rhymes sincethe book Perrault published his stories in was called Mother Goose Tales Of Long Ago.

An old woman comes up to her and asks for some water. The good girl gives her water, and the woman, really a fairy, blesses her. When the girl gets home, whenever she talks, diamonds and beautiful flowers fall out of her mouth.

Aren't diamonds, you know, sharp. How does she live through this kind of experience? I guess the flowers might lessen the impact as the diamonds bump against her throat.
Also, if I were the stepmother (this might make me sound mean), I'd have a surgeon take out the girl's vocal cords and sell them on e-Bay.

The stepmother sends her girl out to the well, hoping the same will happen, but this time the fairy's disquised as a princess, and the mean girl refuses her anything. The fairy curses her, and whenever she talks, snakes and toads come out of her mouth.


The stepmom plans to beat the good girl, who has escaped though into the forest. A young, handsome king finds her, falls in love with her, marries her, and they live happily ever after.

Except for the stepsis who is still in danger of dying by snake venom every time she coughs.

Bonus, Bonus:

Humpty Dumpty

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,

And his reason for this is...?

Humpty Dumpty had a big fall,

Ah ha! The plothole large enough to drive a semi though!

All the king's horses and all the king's men,

Why the horses? How do they help put a broken, giant egg back together?

Couldn't put him together again.

Gory end to a child's rhyme. I propose a new holiday in honor of Humpty:
Giant Omelet Day!

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